Ticks Flee Portsmouth Due to Rising Housing Costs
PORTSMOUTH, NH—If you’ve noticed a lack of ticks this year, recent studies show that they, too, are abandoning the City of the Open Door...
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The Seacoast's Only Reliable News Source Since 1623
Aug 18, 20232 min read
Portsmouth Celebrates 400th Anniversary Watching Rich People Eat
Portsmouth's elite closed down the city streets for the 400th anniversary "street.life" dinner.
Apr 25, 20232 min read
It's Time for Kick-Ass Solutions for Portsmouth: A Guest Editorial by Secret Agent Jim Splaine
No longer sporting his laser eye, former Assistant Mayor and superspy Jim Splaine shares his vision for Portsmouth's future
Apr 14, 20232 min read
Beloved Rochester Heroin Dealer Unmasked as Free State Project Libertarian Activist
"10 Rod Todd" was exposed as running his business only as a front for the controversial Free State Project's libertarian activism.
Apr 4, 20232 min read
City of Dover to Create Central Ave Market and Craft Fair for Stuck Motorists
Officials will launch a craft fair and farmers market to serve drivers stuck from the Chestnut Street bridge closure.
Mar 27, 20231 min read
Sources: Portsmouth is Real and Not a Fake Made-Up Town for Tourists
It has been discovered that the historic brick buildings lining the streets are, in fact, not just elaborate sets constructed for tourists.
Mar 20, 20232 min read
Portsmouth and Dover 400 Arrange Battle Royale for the Fate of the Seacoast
Portsmouth and Dover 400 organizers have made plans to decide the region's fate with a battle royale between the champions of the area.
Mar 14, 20231 min read
Tug Staff Treated for Addiction to Esther Kennedy
After checking themselves into a rehabilitation hospital last July, Tug staff have been treated for their addiction to Esther Kennedy.
Nov 5, 20212 min read
Brighton and Kennedy Return to Lair to Plan for Tomorrow Night
After the 2021 Portsmouth City Council election, Brighton and Kennedy returned to their laboratory to plan for tomorrow night.
Sep 25, 20202 min read
Councilor legally renames herself to the Seal of the City of Portsmouth
In a pre-emptive maneuver against the upcoming City Council vote on the results of her ethics committee hearing, the Councilor formerly know
Jan 16, 20202 min read
LTE - Other Portsmouth Neighborhoods: "We Exist"
A letter to the editor from Portsmouth's "other neighborhoods" asserting their existence and which others should be eliminated.
Oct 28, 20193 min read
EXCLUSIVE: The Tug interview with the Prescott Sisters
An interview with none other than Mary and Josie Prescott, the famous founders of Prescott Park.
Jul 12, 20192 min read
City of Porstmouth Unveils New Name and Logo Unrelated to Councilor’s Tattoo
The City of Porstmouth (formerly Portsmouth) unveiled its new name and logo Monday unrelated Rick Beckstead's recent tattoo.
Jul 9, 20191 min read
City of Portsmouth to counter graffiti artists by just drawing dicks on everything
After a pervasive wave of mediocre graffiti, Portsmouth started a counter-graffiti task force to dissuade the vandals by just drawing dicks.
Mar 5, 20192 min read
Plan to Develop McIntyre Site as Shelter to Survive the Hungry Shadows Draws Mixed Reviews
March 11 2159: Mixed reviews from the survivors of the Battle of the Shipyard Husks on a plan to build a shelter in the McIntyre building.
Jan 8, 20192 min read
McIntyre building to become 24/7 public comment space
McIntyre building on Daniel Street to become a twenty-four hour public comment space to discuss the McIntyre building project.
Jan 3, 20191 min read
Breaking New Grounds Sold After Owner Gets “An Offer He Couldn’t Refuse”
Portsmouth's BNG has been transferred in a hostile takeover from the Govoni family to Southern New Hampshire’s powerful Faro syndicate.
Jul 18, 20182 min read
Editorial: Portsmouth Should Get Sexy on McIntyre
Hear us out: A 24 Hour No-holds-barred Dionysian fuck palace.
May 5, 20183 min read
LTE: Progressive Portsmouth
Portsmouth resident Stacey Simons thought she would take a moment to share a little positivity and love, especially in this climate of hate.
Dec 7, 20172 min read
Public Petition from Short Citizens Seeks to Remedy Music Hall Sign
The neon signage for “Music Hall” reads “Music Hal." Recently, a group of citizen activists under 6 feet tall has started a petition.
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